Trying To Get It Together

Secrets Of Change

From the book, My Own Worst Enemy, some quotes are paraphrased.

“Change is easier when you selectively focus your efforts.  Trying to pull off multiple changes simultaneously is the kiss of death.” I am still trying to fight this idea but after reading the first 107 pages of the book where the author continues to nail my personality traits, habits and tendencies, I have to relent to his advice. “Do not overreach. …if for no other reason than that your attention is limited.”

“To change you must adopt an appropriate long-range perspecitve.  Speed seems important, but is not always the point.”   I can wait years to develop camera film but not want to wait a day so I spend extra for 1 hour photo.  This is also why I gravitate toward the Atkins diet, quick results.  “Emphasizing speed leaves you open to skipping vital steps.”

“Change requires that you persist even when your efforts are having no apparent effect other than disruption in your life.”  Bamboo trees sit for years and then sprout wildly and quickly.

“You cannot change the past.  Which is actually best, one less thing to do.”  This is the first day of the rest of your life.

“Chaos and setbacks are proof that you are changing.”  That point was a hard one for me though I know it is true with children.  When parents or caretakers change routines or discipline, the child will rebel even harder causing the parents to think it isn’t working.  Even watching the Nanny TV shows you see this.  The behavior exacerbates as the child is trying to enforce their will but it will almost always subside.

“The problem is not, nor ever has been or will be who you are.  The problem is always what you choose to do.”  I have noticed that even the smallest of actions outside of my normal habits feel good, though not usually good enough to continue them.

“Change requires that you become fully engaged for a period of contemplation, preparation and decisive action followed by continuing maintenance.”  That last step eludes me because the novelty usually wears off.  I like change and new things but after a while I get bored and want to move on to something else, or a new idea.

“Change is not something that happens to you; it is something that you do.”  There is a problem in here for me.  The best things that have happened to me happened to me by luck or fate it seems.  The things I pushed for rarely happened or went right.  Right or wrong this is how I see life for me.  I have received most of the things I wanted in life by waiting for them.  I don’t know how to reconcile this issue.

“Failure is necessary for learning.”  I absolutely hate to fail which is why at times I don’t try, which is addressed in the book.  Failure does feel fatal at times.  I am very guarded about my failures.

More on change later, I need to read some more.

I Still Haven’t Made A Plan

I am proving the point or at least finding my weakness.  Week 3 is beginning and I still haven’t made a true written plan.  I did continue to read “Your Own Worst Enemy” and it continues to describe me to a “t.”

I will continue to read through it and work on exercises this week but so far my (non) plan is a failure.